"In My Head"

August 29, 2018; Dialogue Only Story

“Do you want me to leave?”
“No, never. It’s too quiet without you.”
“Are you positive? It won’t hurt my feelings.”
“Mmhmm. I’m just tired.”
“You’re always tired. You spend your whole day in bed, Anne.”
“I know. It just seems like too much effort. And the floor creaks, it’s annoying. My bed may be small and kind of old, but it’s still better than the floor.”
“It’s okay. I’ll keep you company when you are conscious.”
“Oh, how are you gonna do that? You’re not even real.”
“I’ve been talking to you for years. You’re the one who decided to talk back, Anne.”
“You know, I can’t say you’re wrong. Don’t really wanna say you’re right either, though.”
“That’s all right. Anne, why did you start speaking to me?”
“I dunno. I was lonely. Heaven knows no one else wants to talk to me. Talking to myself didn’t seem so weird.”
“Oh Anne, other people talk to you. Besides, I wouldn’t respond to you so often if you were really so bad.”
“Gee, thanks. Glad to know my imaginary friend has the ability to ignore me too.”
“I’m not an imaginary friend. I’m a part of you. I live in your brain, not your imagination. We’ve been over this.”
“Sorry, sorry. I know. My therapist hates you.”
“He’s a therapist, it’s his job to get rid of the voices in people’s heads. It’s good you still see him, though.”
“It’s not my fault I hate his office! His chairs are made of that weird fabric that somehow attracts crumbs even if no one’s ever eaten in them. They’re gross. And there are four dead spiders trapped in his window, it’s all I can focus on.”
“You know, Anne, if you spent less time analyzing your therapist’s office and more time letting your therapist analyze you, maybe you wouldn’t think getting out of bed is bothersome.”
“The floor is cold and creaky and there’s always a draft from the window. No one would want to get out of bed if the arctic had moved into their apartment. Besides, who enjoys waking up?”
“There’s a difference between not being a morning person and finding life tedious.”
“Hey, if being a mental mess means I can talk to you, it’s worth it.”
“I’m flattered, but that’s really a horrible way of dealing with a mental illness.”
“I’m fine. Really, it’s not even that bad.”
“Anne. I don’t expect you to actually take my advice, from personal experience trying to help you, but you need to take a bit more care of yourself. I’m part of you, if you start deteriorating I do too.”
“I take great care of myself. Sometimes. I’m just too tired to.”
“Yesterday you drank diet soda for two out of three meals and ate half of a bag of plain tortilla chips for the other.”
“Hey, I ate, I got out of bed, I even took a shower. I’d say I’m doing pretty good.”
“All right. It’s late, go to sleep. You can rehash this entire conversation at your next appointment.”
“Goodnight, me.”
“Goodnight, Anne.”